I finished my last blog entry and called stacey back. She still seems a bit torqued up but I decided to make my move but with sublety. She said that the only thing that really bothered her was how she percieved other peoples treatment around here. She has always had this 'thing' about not being treated equally but I knew that its more to do with how she was treated growing up rather than how she believes she is being treated now. In her home her brothers (her step mothers children) were favoured more than she was for obvious reasons. So whenever she is in any situation she is insistent on being 'equal'. I don't think she understands that it's tranferance. She is attaching her feelings about her step mother onto other people. This has caused huge problems because when she is trying to relate to someone most often times she does it through the "you just like my step mom" or "your just like so and so". I know it's a defense mechanism but its still pretty hurtful. I hope in time someone will help her understand that her perception of the world can't be limited to who fits the roles that shes entrenced herself into being comfortable with. She said she has been writing alot in the composition books that we brought her and that she may not want to show them to me because I will not like what she said. That I think is a kind of veiled way of saying "I'm really pissed off at you". I told her that I had been writing too and that I would not be showing her this blog for the same reason that she won't show me the composition books. I hope maybe in time she will be well enough to see this and understand that not everything was mine or anyone elses fault. But I'm a realist. For a lot of people the journey may begin but may never lead anywhere.